Tale of the Red Hat Gnomes - Part 2

(In the Fire Lotus Tavern) --"You have been quiet a long time," Gerta says as she observes that I am now back and staring into the fire.
--"Ah, yes," I answer trying to find my voice again. Rhetorically I voice a question: "Which is worse for a soldier, to be captured and summarily murdered; or to be imprisoned with a 25% chance of dying?"
--"Andersonville?" Bov queries. At which I nod.
--"Another bad dream I had......but now..."
(In the Guest Quarters of the Blue Hat Gnomes) --A large wooden cart trundles into the guest cavern. Atop this cart stands an imposing, if diminutive, figure; a matronly gnome with light blue hat and full apron, wielding a wooden spoon as long as she is tall. The cart stops and with a wave of her spoon a circular section of the floor rises, as well as stone chairs, suitably sized for the Big World guests.
--Rapping a bell on the cart with her spoon the gnome announces "Dinner!" in a surprisingly loud voice.
--Princess BlueBell walks around the cart and hops up onto the stone table. "May I introduce our resident chef, LunchLady," she says, at which the chef takes a bow. "She is the only one who knows how to prepare....food...for you folksies from the Big World."
--"You don't eat?" Shania asks in perplexity.
--"Oh, we are prodigious partakers," says LunchLady with a smile. "But our diets differ considerably from yours."
--"We eat rocks," BlueBell says. "Although LunchLady makes the most delicious Rocky Road Ice Cream, and Key Limestone Pie, and Mud Pies, as well as more nutritious fare with an abundance of minerals. Personally I am fond of Emerald Green Jello, with real Emerald dust."
--We sit down and discover a pleasing presentation of roast rabbits, steamed carrots, cabbage and some kind of mystery pudding. "Quite good!" I compliment the chef as I sample the feast. "Where did you learn to cook for folks like us?"
--"Ah," muses LunchLady in a trance of remembrance. "For twenty years I stationed myself in the kitchen of one of your finest restaurants, observing everything."
--"What restaurant?" asks Jeb.
--"Why, the HardRock Cafe," she answers.

 

Gabriel does a facepalm when hears that last comment

"Definitely was one of my favorite places to catch a bite when I traveled to Atlanta for Dragon*Con every year, back on Earth...", remarks Gabriel, right before Immersion smacks him on the back of his head...

 

"We seem to be really caught between a rock and a hard place, don't we?", Bodhbh muses while shaking his head... "My, wouldn't it be great if we could get back on track without breaking poor Immersion time and time again? I'd file for workers-comp by now if I were broken in the call of duty that often!"

 

(In a tunnel under the Guaca Desert) --Shader sat dejectedly on the floor of the tunnel, his back against the chest containing the five gold acorns. "I give up!" he wailed plaintively. His efforts to move the chest by himself using magic had created such an enormous amount of Magical Entropy that he could no longer recharge his own reservoir of magic.
--"I'll just have to wait till the Entropy pressure disappates," muttered the low level Red Hat Gnome Mage. "Curse that stupid bicycle riding messenger!"
--Back down the tunnel, from the direction Shader had come, a rumbling noise started...then stopped. "Oh, no, oh no no no!" wailed Shader, for the unused tunnel was collapsing, as was normal for the magic tunnels if they were not used with in a span of time, a span that had passed it seems. Shader had not considered abandoning the chest, for such abandonment would lead to the tunnel collapsing before he could get back....with a sigh, he continued to sit; and wait.
--Back in Red Hat Hegemonial Headquarters, JoeSmith returned to his desk even though he was on vacation, to get something from his desk. He noticed the communication that should have gone to the Tackzer Chief, A.P.Pointed, was lying in his IN basket. JoeSmith moved it to his OUT basket. The mail clerk picked it up and dropped it, along with a packet of mail, on the floor. This particular bit of mail sailed under JoeSmith's desk and was left to collect dust....

 

(In the guest quarters of the Blue Hat Gnomes) --with a wave of her tiny wand Princess BlueBell caused a small stone chair and table to rise from the surface of the guest stone table. LunchLady brought her a small bowl and spoon. "Oooh!" smiled BlueBell, "Rocky Road Ice Cream! With coal rocks!"
--"I have ice cream for you Big Folk too," LunchLady said as she pushed forward a large container and a pile of bowls. "But without the rocks."
--"Thanks," Shania said. Shania was quite taken with the diminuative princess in her tall peaked hat with the bit of veil attached to the peak and her princess style dress. She pondered the tiny damsel and after finishing her ice cream couldn't resist speaking. "Princess BlueBell, you are just too cute! I could pick you up and hug you like a doll!"
--Hamster, who had joined the party and stood beside BlueBell guffawed, "You would get a hernia, methinks, picking BlueBell up!" Then he asked LunchLady, "Did you perchance bring any Rock Candy?"
--Shania seemed perplexed, "Why is that? She isn't very big."
--"Try then," Hamster replied, crunching the rock candy loudly. "Don't say I didn't warn you!"
--Grinning almost as insanely as her boss, the apprentice gnome mage walked across the table and held up her little arms. "Don't drop me on your foot!" she warned.
--Shania put her hands around BlueBell and lifted, or rather tried to lift; quickly she abandoned the idea. "Good Hezmana!" Shania exclaimed, "How much do you weigh?"
--"About 100 lbs," BlueBell said dancing lightly back to her chair.
--"110," hamster said crunching his rock candy. BlueBell stuck out her tongue at him.
--"It'ss nice to be among such ssolid folk," Krisskar said, breaking his long silence. "I do not have much time to loiter here, and you promissed to educate Jeb on the different sscoolss of magic, Princess."
--"Indeed," Jeb nodded. "I suspect our engagements so far have been trivial to what we may yet face."
--"And if we are to intercept the golden acorns," added Ed, "We need to proceed very soon."
--"Can I try some of that rock candy?" Lyra asked. "If it is actually sugar that is."
--"It is sugarfied honey, actually," replied LunchLady. "Here ya go."
--I took in this odd scene and warm conversation, then peered at Krisskar. He had a haunted look about him, and a faraway gaze in his glowing blue eyes. "Krisskar," I said, hoping to bring him out of his revery. "What is it that you must do?"

 

(In a tunnel from the Isle of Feinantz to Laundrytown) --"sure you don't want to take the fifth boss?" UnderLing asked as he panted along with four other toadies pushing the chest containing the replica Golden Acorns.
--"Ha!" Scoffed A.P.Pointed as he walked ahead of the group, reopening the tunnel. "I'll just say I visited for the Easter Egg roll."
--Finally the group reached a Big People sized elevator door, about half the height of the tunnel. "Here we are!" said the boss of the Tackzers. "Push it in boys, I'll have one of Emporer Puppet's toadies drag it out." Pointy then rode up the elevator, gritting his teeth at the cheery upbeat instrumental muzak. "(OOg)" he thought. "(sounds like something those pointy headed Blues would listen to!)"
--As the door opened in the hall of the Beige House just outside Emporer Puppet's office Pointy was greeted by the sight of children running through the hall way. Lots of children, all gibbering in some language Pointy did not recognize. Many of them were sitting on the floor against the wall, shivering and coughing.
--Hailing a nearby minion of the Emperor to tote the chest, Pointy strode into the open door of Puppet's office. Hopping up on the desk he waited patiently as the Emporer finished a phone conversation while looking out the window. "Thousands of them!" Emporer Puppet screeched into the phone. "Whose idea was it to take down the fence around the Beige House anyway?" Not waiting for an answer the Emporer slammed the phone down. He turned around and was surprised to see the Red Hat Gnome standing on his desk, beside the chest of gold acorns.
--"Hey! Pointy! Say could you take some of these kids off my hands? I'll take them back once they are old enough to vote."
--"No can do your wiseness," Pointy said with a bow. "I only got rocks to feed them."
--For a second the Emporer pondered that, then with a sigh said, "Ah well. Maybe I can lower the voting age to fifteen so it doesn't take so long. What's in the box?"
--Unlocking the clasp A.P.Pointed announced with pride, "Five Gold Acorns! Freshly stolen, er ah, acquired from thieving squirrels who stole them!"
--"Stole them from who? Never mind. I don't want to know."
--"Wise indeed oh Emperor."
--"Five." the Emperor gloated. "These should get those dratted tree hugging Dryads off my back!" At that a small female figure with gossamer wings floated down from the Emperor's back to the desk. Pointy grew apprehensive about the fakeness of the chest's contents, but the Dryad slammed the chest shut, sprinkled some kind of glitter dust on it and lassoed it with a rope, towing it up into the air with her.
--"Remember," Pointy said, trying to cover his back. "Skunky told me where to get these. It was all his idea. I can't vouch for the contents of the chest!"
--The Dryad smiled a terrifying smile at the Gnome and said in a horrible musical voice. "YOU brought them! I know where you live! But YOU," she said turning to Emperor Puppet, "YOU are the one who wasted so many of the Golden Oaks!" Then she flew out the door, chest in tow.
--A child was whacking at the gnome now with an aluminum baseball bat; which was quickly becoming full of dents. "Well," Pointy said, "You seem kinda busy there boss, I'll just be going."
--"Get out from under there!" the emperor scolded, dragging a child out from under his desk. "And don't cough on me!"
--Glad he was immune to human diseases, A.P.Pointed, Chief of the Tackzers quickly retreated out of the office, down the elevator and into the tunnel. "Let's go boys," he commanded. "While the going is good."

 

*Time Lord clears his throat listening to Mingo's tail as his eyes widen*
~Time Lord~

 

*begins happily whistling a Mingo tune*
~Time Lord~

 

Bodhbh snaps out of a long reverie as Time Lord starts to whistle and wonders whether we will ever see the end of the tale, and whether all of this will end up having a tail...

Then he looks at Mingo, who seems to be on the verge of floating off again...

 

*the little Time Lord stops whistling, picks up a guitar and begins to play, while Mingo continues his peaceful slumber*

~Time Lord~

 

After Time Lord finishes performing, everyone claps Then, a dulcimer suddenly appears out of thin air in front of Chariya and she performs a piece.



Everyone is mesmerized by her performance except for Mingo, who is still fast asleep in his chair...

Then, Time Lord takes a sip of his drink and joins Chariya for a duet.



But Mingo still remains fast asleep

 

The lady went into a back room and waited for the immersion to come back. She thought it might be a very long wait indeed. She stopped at a bookcase and sat down with a book Winfield had recommended. Fireangel adjusted herself in a comfortable chair by the door to the courtyard, put her feet up on an ottoman, and settled into an old story.

 

Torniquet/blaquerogue gets up and says "its been nice seeing you guys again but we have a mission to complete." Just then Kiru stands up and waves to everyone, and Torniquet and Kiru head out the door.

 

(In the fire lotus tavern) --"Ah," Mingo says. "but what better immersion in a tavern setting than a bardic circle, with folks joining in however they might?"
--Mingo then returns to reading the reply letter from the Queen (actually written by a Lady in Waiting)....the real queen that is, actually written to Mingo's avatar in the Land of RL....it's going to be framed. Mingo is happy to have a copy from his RL Avatar and if he ever gets a house, will post it on the wall.
--Another document has been delivered to Mingo and he sinks deep in thought concerning it. Adorned with a seal and a ribbon it is a copy of his RL Avatar's award of patent. This portends much taking of time away from SOTA, and the RL "Quest for MORE RAM !!!!" in order to re enter the SOTA world some day.
--Music in a tavern, appropriate you must grudgingly admit eh FireAngel?
--then Mingo begins to sing a new song he wrote, to the tune of "My bonny lies over the ocean"
(Note: this is kind of SCA oriented...Society for Creative Anachronism--Kingdom of Meridies)

...Meridien women are curvy
...They certainly have been well fed!
..and when they walk down by the list field
...Their wiggle turns many a head!.
(chorus)
...Look Back! Look back! Oh look back and beckon to me, to me!
...Look Back! Look back! Oh look back and beckon to me!

...Now fighting requires rapt attention
...Distractions are something to dread
...And many an amorous fighter
...Has suffered a blow to the head (chorus)

...Young lords in need of a lady
...Might ponder these words that are true.
...An apple might pick out a farmer,
...and thus it will happen to you. (chorus)

...Oh throw me a glance o'er your shoulder
...A smoldering wink and a smile
...Meridien lady most curvy,
...Invite me to dally a while! (chorus)

...We bards are not known to wear armor
...In truth it is under our clothes
...For sometimes the ladies aren't single
...And often, in haste must we go! (chorus)

...So ladies remember this lesson
...and carefully manage your charms.
...for nature provided you weapons
...That can best any brave man at arms! (chorus)

 

*the little Time Lord happily claps with joy*
~Time Lord~

 

Bodhbh groans at the song, and once it is done he asks Mingo "does that also mean we'll see even less of you in the tavern for a while, my friend? Will this story ever be finished?"

 

(In the fire lotus tavern) "He's breathing!" Gerta shouted, waking up the denizens of the Fire Lotus Tavern.
--"Of coarse I'm breathing," I grumbled. "Or is it course? I can never remember."
--"Get ye a Thesaurus," recommended FireAngel.
--"Why on earth would I want a dinosaur?" I asked perplexed.
--"The Story!," Time Lord insisted, "Continue the story!"
(In the guest quarters of the Blue Hat Gnomes) --King Dohlar was an imposing Gnome. With great aplomb he caused the stone floor beneath him to form a rising column, lifting him to the height of the stone table. "His majesty, Dohlar, King!" called out his herald, who had more speedily hopped up onto the tabletop. We all rose and bowed slightly.
--King Dohlar caused a throne to form from the stone of the table top and seated himself, whereupon his herald bade us all take our seats. I stared unabashedly at the diminuative figure of a man, in his prime if white headed, sporting a short white beard and wearing a striking crown of gold with glinting blue stones resembling etched robin's eggs. There are some beings who exude quality, and have that aura of competence that impels one to be respectful. King Dohlar was one such being.
--"Welcome back, Krisskar, Warlock of the Ruins; and welcome to you all," he added. Then with brevity although lacking any malice he mildly demanded: "Who are you all and what do you want? We aren't open for business quite yet."
--Jeb Stuart, our battle leader, seemed quite taken with the King, and made introductions. Jeb seemed most grateful to find a being he could immediately respect.
--"Pray tell your majesty," Lyra asked in a very polished courtly manner, "to what business did you refer?"
--"Why, the printing business," the king answered turning to his herald, "Hand me one of those bills." Before us he placed on the table top a piece of printed paper, about the size of my hand. "We are printing these."
--Lyra picked up the piece of paper and studied the designs and markings. "What do you call it?" she asked.
--"A Dohlar of course," replied the herald. "Want to borrow some?"

 

The lady entered the Tavern and sat a little distance from the others. She saw their perplexed look, but before she could verbally answer, she grabbed her handkerchief and sneezed. She grabbed at her throat with a pale hand, and made a slight grimace. "Ow." Fireangel gently blew her nose and dabbed at her face. She put away her handkerchief and smiled up at them. "Hello again. I've been away exploring a new land. I have a cold, I think." She gestured around her head in general. "Ear sort of itches and aches, sore throat, respiratory problems. Nothing major, but I don't want to give it to any of you, of course. This too shall pass." The lady laughed lightly. "Sorry. I should have said how glad I am to see you all. I am. I hope everyone is well. Mingo, you're deep in the corn still, I see."

 

Bodhbh makes a small bow from where he sits and responds "Sé do bheatha, mo chara bantiarna! Sláinte a duit!... I am doing fine, and I have seen others of this group pop in and out, and they too seemed to be healthy! Tis Mingo here whom I am concerned about! I have not yet seen him like this for as long as it has now been. I too have been in and out, but I have been informed, and checked myself too..." - gestures to the stack of logs next to the fireplace - "but there has not been a sign of life from him in a long time!"
"I recommend you have some warm chicken broth with a splash of uisce beatha!"

 

(In the vicinity of the FireLotus Tavern) I walked up the grade in the late afternoon heat of an unusually hot mid September day, nodding to Ned the Stableboy who, having finished his chores, was amusing himself with a rousing game of 'kick the dirt". Passing the crafting pavilion, now abandoned as folksies were going home for some supper, I turned left and up the few steps to the front porch of the Fire Lotus Tavern.
---With great weariness I lowered my shoulder bag (which contained some music books and penny whistles, along with a recently acquired keyless plastic flute--Key of D) to the porch floor and took a seat in one of the rocking chairs; adjusting my sword, my officer's Kukri, my twin daggers in the horizontal sheath behind my back on my belt, and the small mace hanging next to my belt pouch. The Belt pouch I wore (fashioned from a lady's purse bought cheap and with the strap cut and resewn to two belt loops was lighter than I was used to, as my pet glock was not allowed in these demesnes.
--Although it was still about 90 F the breeze was steady and the humidity low. I appreciated the coolness. The screen door slammed and a small oriental boy emerged, taking a seat in another of the rocking chairs. "Long time, Mr. Mingo," he said.
--"It's good to be here, Time Lord. Good to be anywhere that is cool," I said back.
--"Cool?" young TL said with a questioning glance of perplexity.
--"Relatively cool, yes," I answered.
--"You have been gone a long time," observed the boyish incarnation of the Time Lord, who was in fact much older than I. "I thought you said you were retired."
--"Who are our friends?" I asked rhetorically. "When do enemies become friends, and friends adversaries? How do you help the Good Ones when they act and believe the same thing as the Bad Ones?"
--"There is little certain in the Metaverse," opined the young Time Lord.
--"Indeed."