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Providing Carbon offsets for Shroud of the Avatar PATCH R34 compliant!

Discussion in 'Vendor Locations & Misc Services' started by Yipp, Sep 27, 2016.

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  1. Yipp

    Yipp Avatar

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    Providing Carbon offsets for Shroud of the Avatar PATCH R34 compliant!

    [​IMG]


    Strip mining ore from virgin mountains, chopping down trees from unspoiled forests, burning coal to craft your wares which blacken the skies.

    YOU are the cause of global warming in Shroud of the Avatar!

    Novia, Hidden Vale, Norgard and Elysium are suffering because of you!

    Beaches are washing away, homes are being destroyed, habitat will never recover.

    However do not worry for we at the "A Bandit Camp" of Bastion's Point, "A Smuggler" proprietor have a low cost solution to sooth your guilty conscience.

    We are offering for a limited time an "Official Looking" Bastion's Point Home Owners Association "Carbon Offset" certificates to ease your conscience!

    Using the same legal concept as Royal or Papal dispensation's, these certificates can be used by you to shove in Leonardo DiCaprio's face on his private plane or on Justin Bieber's bottle service tray at the nightclub to get preferred seating!

    Lord British and DarkStarr will also accept them as compensation for absolutely nothing!

    For a limited time only these "Official Looking" Bastion's Point Home Owners Association "Carbon Offset"certificates, can be yours for a suggested donation of only 199 gold, at the player owned town Bastion's Point, "A Bandit Camp", "A Smuggler" proprietor.

    [​IMG]

    So acquire one or more offsets and know the next time you smelt ingots, craft a table, strip mine ore from an innocent mountain, or burn nasty coal, that you can do so with a smile on your face and happy heart knowing someone else has taken the burden of your actions off your shoulders for the low suggested donation of 199 gold!

    For a small additional suggested donation of 50 gold you can also purchase an endangered species waiver allowing you to murder Rabbits, Doe's, Wisps etc... without the worry of eternal damnation or being forced to hear about it from your boyfriend or girlfriend over their Kale and Bean Gluten Free Salad.

    Offering soon Upon Death Skill Decay Insurance! Stay tuned for details....

    Bastion's Point is located between Solace Bridge and Solton. Use the convenient Lunar Rift http://sacrifice-guild.enjin.com/lrchronometer to save time and no worries on the effects on the environment because Lunar Rift emissions are also covered by this certificate!

    Please be further advised this certificate carries the full legal weight you would expect from an official looking certificate such as this and will be fully defended in any court proceedings with regards to its validity within the realms of Novia, Hidden Vale, Norgard and Elysium, by the legal firm of Duey, Cheatem and Howe of Bastion's Point, located in the basement of the "A Bandit Camp", "A Smuggler" Esquire, Attorney at Law graduated University of Port Phoenix Online Class of 404.

    [​IMG]
     
    Yipp, Sep 27, 2016
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  2. zeapo

    zeapo Avatar

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    *Heads to buy a certificate*
     
    zeapo, Sep 27, 2016
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  3. Deadly Habit

    Deadly Habit Avatar

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    Global warming in Britannia isn't real!
     
    Deadly Habit, Sep 27, 2016
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  4. Lord Dreamo

    Lord Dreamo Avatar

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    :p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p:p
     
    Lord Dreamo, Sep 27, 2016
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  5. drahn

    drahn Avatar

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    Love it!

    PS: Would be interested in a 'Save our Seas Certificate' too!
    I have been exploring fishing lately and think I may be over fishing a couple spots!
     
    drahn, Sep 28, 2016
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  6. Greyfox

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    As useful as the real ones. Al is that you? Manbearpig?

    Got me thinking, I would plant a tree for 50k gold. Send a picture too. Any takers?
     
    Greyfox, Sep 28, 2016
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  7. Yipp

    Yipp Avatar

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    YES! Just as useful!
    Was temporarily sold out! Sorry for the inconvenience to those that came by and found the supply exhausted, Vendor is now Restocked!
     
    Yipp, Sep 28, 2016
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